Be Aware of Your Perspective

Morning Muffin: The time has come to do away with the thought that someone is “doing something TO you”. This journey called LIFE is filled with curved roads, peaks, valleys, precious moments and even tears. We are all experiencing LIFE at the same darn time. Yes folks lie on you, but they also lie to themselves. Yes relationships go bad, but everyone wants their someone…sometimes we just take the long way “home”. There is no trick to it..there is only your perspective that affects your journey. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to be aware of your perspective. Know that there isn’t a conspiracy always at play to keep you from growing. That, my friend, is the ultimate deception. We have allowed so many things to pollute the way we see life. As the Ghetto Boys once sang “My Mind’s Playing Tricks On Me”…these attitudes of defeat, deception and discouragement are tools of your greatest enemy. Replace that with love, compassion and victory! ~Be Blessed #CoachKishapproved

 

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The Evolution of Change

Daily Nugget: Change is a process. You will have days when you feel “I got this!” and you will have days when you think “This will never work”. Change IS A PROCESS. What you cannot do is turn and retreat when those rough moments come. Why? Because they are just moments. There will always be times in life when we wonder when is it all just going to come together. You are not alone in that. We cannot know what the other side looks like if we won’t do the work to get there. Change is a PROCESS, Change creates PROGRESS, Change is PRICELESS! You are worth the work, your best life and your purpose filled existence is waiting for you! Let’s get busy!!!

 

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Balancing Act 101

“If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing” 1 Corinthians 13: 3

 

Often, in life, we become overwhelmed with all that we have taken on feeling very depleted and as many of us discover “with nothing to show for it”.  We have to work, our husbands/wives need us, children require our time. We care for aging parents and friends call on us for support. We surrender “me time”, we put off going back to school, cancel gym memberships and rarely tend to our own needs. Does this sound familiar?

One of our greatest challenges in life is finding balance. Time to do the things we need to do and time to enjoy the fruits of our labor. At some point many of us justify short changing ourselves because we feel guilty about not being everything for everyone around us. What if I take that vacation and something happens while I am gone? What if I sign up for school and no one is home when the kids get there? What if I spend that money? What if I oversleep? It is never a blessing to be everything for everyone and yet nothing for yourself.  Should I say that again?

It is never a blessing to be everything for everyone else and yet nothing for yourself.  When we give, let it be from a place of abundance. Give love to others by first having love for yourself. Give time to others by first making time for yourself. You see when we experience the benefit of the gift, we can give it more abundantly. How can you counsel someone if you are stressed out yourself? How can you loan money if all your bills are behind? How can you give love if you don’t feel you deserve love?

I have met some of the most giving, loving people in the world. They will surrender the shirt on their very back but live in misery. Somehow in all their good deeds they feel unworthy of partaking in some of that goodness for themselves.  The relationships we nurture should come from a wholeness and ability to share some of what is in us, not just out of courtesy or “doing the right thing”.  Once you love yourself you will give a love that moves mountains. Once you take care of yourself you will care for others in a way that uplifts, supports and empowers.  Wholeness thereby speaks to your abundance. Think about it when you have a car you love you put in the “good” gas, that represents the way we love others, but when you driving the hooptee any ole gas will do, that represents how we treat ourselves.

How can you put more into being a blessing if you are not first thankful for YOUR blessing? Do you intend to treat your blessings as burdens? You see life is a blessing. Love for self is a blessing.  Balance is a blessing. It is time to embrace our blessings and walk in our truth. Let your motto be “ I am better to you when I am great to me.”  An abundance of love will allow us to give and never run dry. Why? Because we have tapped into a source who never runs short on the supply.

How do you know when your balance is off? You feel it. Too tired to think, overwhelmed and depressed.  Alone and annoyed…depleted.  Balance is key. There will always be just 24 hours in a day, no matter how you look at it. The quantity of time spent will not change the world but the quality of time spent will. Your best life is still waiting for you to receive it. Gain from it so that you may share the abundance with others.

 

“Faith, hope and love…but the greatest of these is love” 1Corinthians 13:13

 

 

In My Spirit

Confession: I don’t know if anyone else has ever felt the way I am right now…disconnected from my own spirit, my higher self. Somehow disenchanted from what I know to be true, that God loves me..even now when I have doubted him.
Life is filled with peaks and valleys. Friends call us in their time of need and when we are in that connected “good” place we can offer some amazing advice (I have even stopped to write down some of the things I have said because they were so phenomenal). We take pride in sharing the goodness of God, His unwavering love and undeniable mercy.  We let them cry on our shoulders when they feel all is lost. We pray with them, we pray for them and we constantly reassure our loved ones that even in the valley moment their breakthrough is right upon them if they can just hold on.  But what happens when it’s you? When you have been a good friend, the voice a reason and the walking talking testimony of faith? On that day when just about everything fell apart and you feel so set aside by even God himself. Now I know someone out there is thinking “what in the world are you talking about?” My answer is simple…keep living.  I have watched people if questionable motives achieve big things. I have seen innocent children abused. I am aware of women who have children they don’t want while other women are barren and wish for an opportunity to be a mother. So much broken-ness. And while I know that the righteous are never forsaken, my head knows that, but my heart and my spirit feel worn and tired. I wonder am I the only one?

I have been directed to many scriptures as proof that no matter how bad things seem..GOD is able and willing to bring us through (yea though I walk THROUGH the valley..Psalm 23). Are we not good Christians if we fear the evil? If we worry about the destruction of our families? When we cry out in pain and cannot find the peace within? Is it wrong to want to have our feelings understood without questioning our beliefs?

It is my prayer that these disconnected moments are few and far between for every single one of you. It is also my prayer that you find a human connection that provides a window, a way back. If you know someone who is going through the valley, stand for them..one day you may need someone to stand in the gap for you. In the meantime, be blessed and be a blessing!

I’m Afraid of….SUCCESS

I’m afraid of success…sounds crazy right? Well it’s true and I know I am not alone.  You see, most of us are all too familiar with what it feels like to lose. We spend a great deal of our existence getting over losses (relationships, jobs, money, friendships, loved ones, status). What we often run from is the mysterious place called SUCCESS.  I often find myself excited about the potential a project holds. I dream about living in the house of my dreams, driving the car of my dreams, standing in an arena speaking to crowds as far as the eye can see dressed finer than frog hair but then I wake up.  In a relationship, I fantasize about being the pampered princess getting flowers, candy and all kinds of gifts just because I exist. I imagine being celebrated and longed for…adored. Then I wake up.  You see success is, for most of us, very much a beautiful nightmare.  I have been afraid that I would make it to that place (success) and be seated at a table, right next to Oprah, Michelle Obama, Ellen, Queen Latifah and Maya Angelou. I picture them laughing and sharing stories of success much greater than mine. I fear the moment they ask my opinion because I couldn’t imagine being polished enough to have anything purposeful to add to the conversation. I fear realizing, at that moment, I am not a success…just a lucky fool.

Fear of failure is not often the culprit that ‘s keeping us shackled to a mediocre existence…fear of our own greatness is.  Spending too much second guessing where we belong, if we are deserving, what if “they” are better than I think I am are the haunting thoughts that rob us of being truly free.  Looking at ourselves in a warped mirror (state of mind) and finding nothing more than flaws. What do successful people know that we don’t? I figure they know that win or lose tomorrow is going to come and I can try again. Success thereby is more of an attitude..a state of being, than anything else.

Every day I live I get to choose who I want to be. Fear of being great is a smoke screen too many of us have gotten caught up in.  I have dreamed a lot of dreams in my lifetime. All of which are truly achievable. Never have I dreamed I was a fish in the ocean or a bird in the sky.  I dreamed I was great in my purpose. I am prosperous and respected. I am loved and needed. I have friends and family. That is winning..on every level!

What is the lesson here? Don’t let fear steal your joy. Don’t let the enemy throw your dream, your purpose into the black hole of nothingness. You already know what failing looks like. It is time to know what winning, growing, loving and showing is! Once upon a time, this blog was even a dream. Fear tried to kill it, WHO DO YOU THINK WON?

Blessings~

 

I’m Happy With Who I Am…I’m Just Worried Are You Happy with Who I AM?

Submitted by member: Shaunte’ Reid

I have been feeling some sort of way and just a moment ago it hit me. I am happy with my curves and my rolls and my thickness but I am not happy when YOU point it out to me. I can stand in front of my mirror and love me up something serious but when YOU get there I worry. Now I know what you are thinking if HE loves me HE should love me always. The catch is I mean women too. We as women see other women full figured or slim and for some unspoken reason “we don’t like her”. I am the type of person that usually miss the concept of the size of the next woman. Why? Because I am too busy making sure I look right. I find my days smiling at me loving me up and someone will come and say “You shouldn’t do that. Let someone else love you” but if I wait around for some random person to say they love me and never show myself any love where is the justification in that. Yes I have moments when I want to weigh less but really I love the skin I am in. Why should I change? Who knows what is good for me? Any doctor will say being healthy is the key. So if I eat healthy, watch my sugar and never have any issues does that make YOU better than me because YOU are skinny. Why compare? The joke is on you people who exercise everyday because my doctor told me my cholesterol rate was one that most of his slimmer, I run fifty miles a day, patients do not have. Guess what the doctor said? “How did you do it?” Yeah my hips, curves and rolls may offend YOU but I am sick and tired of trying to change them so YOU will stop giving me that look YOU do when YOU see me coming. I am happy, I love myself and truly I do not plan on changing. Now I know some people feel like you have to change for your mate but guess what…..If he start loving these curves right, he won’t want to stop. Love the skin you are in as I hug myself for being a thick girl with curves that JUST LOVE ME SOME ME!!!

Forgiveness – It Is For YOU!

Strange thing about forgiveness…it does more for you than for the other person. When we forgive we release burden, pain, resentment, vengence and grief. I have been guilty of holding on to be mad so long that I forgot what all the chaos was about in the first place. Forgiveness, sistas, renews the spirit. In everyone’s life will come a day when we need this. From intimate relationships to friendships. From family to co workers. Your day, if it hasn’t already come, certainly will. A friend of mine, whom I love dearly, and I spent three long years not speaking over something which could have been resolved in a matter of minutes. The kicker was the root of the problem was somewhere going right on with their lives totally oblivious to the pain they’d caused. It took us three years to figure that out…whats 3 time 365? Hell, a whole lot of lost moments. Today, we are smarter and wiser but changed. There seems to have been something stolen from us that cannot be replaced. Time can do that. This is something that saddens me to this day. Time, ladies, is abstract. It waits for no one and it does not repeat itself. All we have is this moment, this hour, this day to make things right. Don’t lose that opportunity. I have learned that it is not always so important to win the battle. I just want to not lose what is really important. Time won’t give me back those three years. But within God’s grace I have today to say “I love you and I am sorry” —- Blessings